So… the (in)famous one night stand issue. YAY or NAY? I would like to preface this post firstly by saying that in June some of my work will be published on Laugh Lots, Travel Often (LLTO). The girls over there write a fantastic blog and one of their recent articles which piqued my interest was One night stands: ego affirming or soul destroying?
Secondly, I received so much fantastic feedback via text, email and facebook messages from the Blendr post so thank you. However there were very few actual comments left on the post. Don’t forget you are welcome to post anonymously, so would be great if possible to get a more open forum going So if any posts do spike your interest, please feel free to comment – would love to see and hear your thoughts and comments. But for now, back to the one night stand.
Two of the LLTO girls debated the topic, one a believer in one night stands and the other firmly opposed to it. Personally, I’m not a great believer in them however I have still gone down that path and have friends that do it on a regular basis, some who have had too many to care to remember. One girl once told me she was in a “drought”… she hadn’t slept with anyone in an ENTIRE WEEK! I try not to judge but this was a little bit of a shock to me, do you really need to sleep with someone new every single week?! What happens when, and if you meet the one and you can’t remember how many people you’ve slept with, who they were or what even happened… Or God forbid, the one is friends with some of your one nighters? But perhaps I analyse the number too much, perhaps a number doesn’t really matter, we should just accept our loved ones for who they are. I believe in ‘experience’ but I also believe that it is something that should be done with someone that you really want to be with.
While I can certainly understand the ‘for’ viewpoint on the one night stand issue, most things definitely do seem like they are going to be a lot of fun when you’re dancing the night away with a few drinks, good friends and a cute male (or female for that matter). However I am not so sure how fun it still is when you stumble home in the glare of a Sunday morning, dress suddenly way too small, make up and hair everywhere. Perhaps by turning down one night stands I’ve missed out on opportunities. I have friends that have turned their one night stands into serious long term relationships and are still together, personally however, that’s not for me. Perhaps a little naïve and old school but I hope that the next person I date can respect me enough to not have to jump into bed the night we meet.
At a recent dinner with friends the one night stand issue reared its head… two of us had indulged while the other one hadn’t. Interestingly enough, the two of us that had indulged stood firmly against doing it again while the other believed it was something that must be done before ‘settling down’… and I have to say, I agree with this. It is one of those things you need to get out of your system, one of those things you do in your youth. In saying that however, I know people who for personal and/ or religious reasons have decided not to sleep with anyone until their wedding night and that is completely up to them. On the same token however, I have seen first hand what happens when people don’t have fun and live a little carefree and recklessly when they are young. When you start trying to live like this when you get older there is a much greater chance that you are going to hurt a lot more people, especially if a family or children suffers because of your indiscretions. So to conclude, I hope that whatever you decide to do, you make the make the decision that is right for you… for me however, many ‘older’ people I know; family, family friends, mentors and the like have all told me to try before you buy… as long as you always, always practice safe sex. Safe sex=good sex.
What are your experiences? Are you yay or nay to the one nighter?